Working on set today

I received the best direction

Go faster.

That was the direction I was given.

Before then?

I was stiff.

I was in my head.

I was trying ‘to get it right’.

Do you know what happens when a clown tries to ‘get it right’?

You don’t want to know.

It’s neither funny nor pretty to watch.

It smells like the space between the party and just before starting to clean up.¹

The pleasure is gone.

If a clown trying to ‘get it right’ had a sound, the sound would be that of a terrified rabbit in agony.

Actually, it would be a terrified rabbit, screaming in agony and terror while dragging their teeth down a chalkboard and doing an overwinded jazz interpretation of some shitty national anthem.

A clown trying to ‘get it right’ is a clown who’s stuck in their head.

A clown stuck in their head needs to be decapitated.

You may be wondering, how might I decapitate a clown if so asked?

You don’t.

They do it to themselves.

Go faster.

That’s all you tell them.

Then tell them. Good.

Then tell them to go faster again.

Eventually they’ll run into a low flying h…