Upon entering a grocery store

There is only one person you need to see

The meat manager!

That’s correct.

The meat manager.

They are the supreme ruler of the grocery store.

They manage the meat

Fresh meat?

They manage it.

Smoked meat?

They manage it.

Frozen meat?

You betcha. They manage frozen meat too.

So much meat to manage. So much to manage all this meat. It’s a fleshy burden. Marbled and ready to grill. In the domain of meat management, the steaks are high. If you don’t perform, you’re roasted.

Tenderloin?

These jokes write themselves.

THE MEAT MANAGER! I ROAR AT THE CLERK WHO ASKS IF I’M LOOKING FOR SOMETHING

THEMEATMANAGERTHEMEATMANAGERTHEMEATMANAGER GRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOAOOAOOAOAAAAARRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!

I can see the scene unfolding before my eyes:

Me: Are you the meat manage?

Them: (curt nod)

Me: Do you manage the meat?

Them: (curt nod)

Me: Allllllll the meat?

Them: (curt nod)

Me: Well then. I’ve been waiting all my life to say this to you:

Hell Meat Manager, it’s my pleasure to meet you.

you see what i did there?

well.

at least was trying to do.

If I did something…

But that?

I know.

So disappointing.

Such a silly, sideways playful attempt.

You came along with me… Ok… where’s he taking me.

yup.

Nowhere.

I’ve got nothing.

The Meat Manager?

I just like the idea of being in charge of the meat. It would be quite a creepy thrill. Especially if you changed your title to Head Zookeeper at the Zombie Zoo.

But the joke? That was a lot of set up that went nowhere.

It usually is my intention to take you somewhere with me.

And today?

We went down a glorious dead end resulting in one of the most pathetic of pathetic jokes.

It was like a dad joke only really long and drawn out like the long and drawn out over explanations that are sooooo awkward. I have always enjoyed the work of Eugene Levy. My favourite is his role as Jim’s dad Jim in the American Pie franchise. He drives his son bonkers by over explaining everything.

Feeling awkward yet?

If so, let’s move on to the One Derful thing of the day…


One Derful Thing

Tell the meat manager joke to some one else. Come up with a better ending.

Hell, come up with a better beginning and middle too.

The only component that is necessary is that it needs the line:

I want to meet the meat manager.

Share your Meat Manager joke in the comments below

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Remarkably Foolish Video of the Week

This is so gross. And? So brilliant. Mr Meaty!


Remarkably Foolish Playlist of the Week:

There are songs here that always make me smile.