Uncle Bobby and the Mayor of Dartmouth
This is happening. You can't prevent it
My father has a twin brother - Uncle Bobby.
Uncle Bobby makes teeth.
He makes teeth at the denture clinic his father Bob started.
The clinic is across the street from the taxi stand that Bob also started after the war.
It still bears his name.
Bob’s Taxi is as much a part of Dartmouth as the lakes that are its most prominent feature.
My Uncle Bobby? He’s Dartmouth. He’s been running lunchtime hockey at the Sportsplex since they opened the place in the early eighties.
In 1995 a former mayor of Dartmouth betrayed Dartmouth. He made Dartmouth amalgamate with Halifax. Halifax is where the managers lived. Halifax knows better. Halifax is fairly widely resented in Dartmouth.
This is a rust belt story. A place whose identity as a legal entity is gone. Dartmouth is changing. People like Uncle Bobby don’t mind. And? They’re still a bit miffed around the whole Dartmouth thing.
So… What to do? This calls for a mass action.
This calls for a massive joke.
I’m writing to invite you to join me in this joke.
It’s pretty simple. I’m going to hold an election.
An election for the Mayor of Dartmouth.
There is no legal Dartmouth. Anyone can declare themselves mayor of Dartmouth.
And I figured it would be fun to have an election.
I figured it would be fair to give Uncle Bobby a chance.
So. I got the URL www.mayorofdartmouth.com
Don’t bother clicking. The site isn’t finished yet.
And here’s where you come in.
If you live in the Greater Dartmouth area or outlying areas like Halifax, BLT, Bedford or even Cole Harbour, please consider nominating a real person. Or something local - like the butter chicken meat pie at Humble Pie.
If you are not in the Greater Dartmouth area, please nominate someone or something funny.
Nominate your dog’s left lung if you must, just send me a picture and tell a story.
This is what I need from you:
The name of who is being nominated
A picture of them
Likes / dislikes
Vision for Dartmouth’s future - given that it’s a non existing legal entity.
Where this goes:
This is all going to show up on the website so that when we go live, there’s some funny stuff already there. That funny stuff? That’s your stuff.
What you get?
You get to enjoy the glee of being on the inside at the beginning of a very stupid joke. In fact, you get to help create the joke.
Your nomination might just win the title.
I would like to start by nominating my Uncle Bobby.
Bio and pics to follow.
Act now and I’ll feature the first few nominations in the Foolsletter.
Call for submissions
Thank you for the overwhelming support with your hilarious stories of embarrassment for The Remarkable Fools Journal. This is a reminder that the deadline for submissions is March 21. Keep the stuff coming. Will it be good enough? Highly likely.
If you missed it, please send me a 3 to 500 word story about “It was embarrassing then but is funny meow” - Stories from high school for The Remarkable Fools Journal which will be published on April 1, 2021 on as a newsletter. The goal? We all get to laugh at how stupid we used to be and likely still are ;-)
This one’s a custom job. I made it. Just for you.
Thirty seven minutes of music to linger into spring with. Sip coffee in sunshine. Pause. Everything is getting warmer. These songs will warm your soul.
How deep is your love?
These jokes are old. And? That’s what makes Rodney brilliant.
His father was a vaudeville performer who left the family.
His self deprecating humour is fantastic. Watch as he adjusts his tie and keeps Johnny Carson laughing all night.
Can you come up with your own Rodney one liner?
Post it here.
Bonus points for sending a photo of you in a jacket like Carson’s
One Derful Thing
Close your eyes and tap your forehead.
Rodney had a tic. He adjusted his tie. That bit of a business wasn’t merely nerves. It bought him time, it accented the ‘insecurity’ that went with the self deprecation.
It was a way to support his work.
Come up with your own. ie: when trying to thing of something, or look for something, pause for a moment. Close your eyes like you’re really concentrating. Tap your forehead like you’re trying to jump start your brain.
Come up with your own little gesture. Use it while talking with people. Do it more until they notice.
What did you learn?
How can you play with a distracting, repetitive seemingly unaware gesture?