During the most recent wave of the pandemic.
I had a royal catastrophy.
I broke a crown.
Not over the head of a monarch.
But instead over the remains of a mollar.
Now?
I’m chewing on one side of my mouth.
Though not quite the same as talking out of both sides of my mouth, I’m still concerned.
What will become of my aggression?
We humans are nasty aggressive animals.
We first make this experssion of aggression with our mouths.
Ask any massage therapist - or any osteopath for that matter - where do people hold their tension in their bodies.
The reply will be: “everybody’s different.”
And with some pressing, jaw tension will eventually be shared as an aswer.
Like I said, we humans are awful, violent, creatures.
Even as babies we have a capacity for cruelty.
Don’t belive me?
Ask any nursing mother.
They’ll tell ya.
Those nipples didn’t destroy themselves.
I haven’t been chewing on nipples.
With a toothache, I’ve been chewing on as little as possible.
And I’ve only been chewing on one side of my mouth.
I’ve been chewing tentatively, thoughtfully and hesitantly lest I bite my own tongue and have to deal with a mouth sore.
How do you deal with your aggression?
I know that this may be a difficult thing to swallow, but you destroy life in order to live. You, me and all of us? We take something that was living, beautiful and whole and pulverize it. We grind things down and mash them up before sending them into an acid bath where we extract what we can then pass the rest as waste.
So, you are inherently voilent and aggressive.
How do you deal with the violence that’s a necessary part of your humanity?
Still don’t think that you’re aggressive and violent?
Tell that to the screaming carrots.
Perfect. "Screaming carrots".
In my work as an organic food purveyor, I refer to us as composters. I encourage drinkers of my herbal teas to save the dregs in the fridge for a day and add them to their smoothies ...because we are composters and after the hot water has extracted some of the goodness out of the herbs when you made the tea, your body can extract the rest.
Similarly, I think intensive experiences and emotions need to be digested. The good, the learning, extracted and the rest eliminated like a turd. Is therapy a compost accelerator for the soul?
Grumpy people and those with chips on their shoulders (not lays or ruffles), I picture them as having big emotional fridges stuffed with green, slimey fuzzies on old hurts they refused to digest. They are constipated in spirit. They pull out the putrified remains of their life's disappointments whenever they get a chance like a morbid kid at show and tell. "See this? This is an awful thing that happened to me." Or worse, "See this, this is an awful thing you did you me." I putrid fridge is a health hazard, whether it be for food or emotions.
When I recognize my negative feelings have been around long enough to have become a grumpy mood, I check my fridge. What's getting a little fuzzy in there. Time to compost that. Take the learning, shit out the worthless energy and walk away with a lighter spring in my step and sway in my hips. Well, it's not worthless energy really. It's incredibly valuable, once it is outside of you.