The tightwire routine

New wine in old bottles

Early in my career, I decided to be a clown. At the time I was bitterly disappointed by the lack of literature on ‘how to be a clown’.

There were only a couple of books. One of which was called Clown Acts Omnibus, or Clown Acts For All.

How convenient,  a book with simple clown acts that anyone could do. As improbable as it was, this was a guide for everyone to be funny. It’s advice was exactly what you would expect in something written for everyone: It was very broad and not very insightful.

It contained instructions for costumes, character development and a couple of simple slapstick routines. One of these routines was a ‘tightrope walker’ bit.

In the tightrope walker routine, the clown entered with two chairs and a rope. They would tie the rope to the back of each chair and attempt to walk on it. They would not succeed. Hilarity would ensue. 

Well. For someone hilarity would ensue. I tried this routine several times without summoning so much as a jaded snort from the audience. I thought…