the sputtering two strokes of living well

vrrr vrrr vrrr

How do you practice restraint?

Oh, dear reader, today was difficult.

You see there was a man using a gas powered weed wacker who wasn’t using it well. It’s my favorite version of a cordless string trimmer.

I love the smell of rich gasoline mixed with oil. I love the dank odour of the exhaust mixed with mutilated plants.

But this man did not know what the hell he was doing with it. He was abusing his tool.

Initially, when starting a dandelion slasher, it’s important to use the choke. Cut off the air, give it a bit too much gas and the extra rich mixture tends to burn better.

The choke is a tool of restraint. You cut off the air, you keep the engine from running wild, and you get a better result. And you know what dear reader, over time I’ve been developing my own verbal choke.

Maybe I’m learning, but likely?

I’m just getting old.

But perhaps that’s why I love starting cold two stroke motors. Prime the carb, use the choke, boom, magic.

Sure, you’re at risk of flooding the thing but for the most part, choking off the air and letting the mix be more fuel rich is essential.

Think of it as drinking a coffee on an empty stomach.

That always gets things moving down below much more quickly.

Is this the same for you dear reader, or is this just a me thing?

Anyway,

This tool with a tool was being a fool. He was trying to cut grass with too much gas and not enough air. The result? A terrible rough idling sound of vrrr vrrr vrrr!

I’m surprised that the motor even worked at all.

Essentially though?

He was neither effective nor efficient.

He just made a lot of hot dirty exhaust filled with wasted fuel and a whole bunch of noise.

I wanted to let him know how the motor worked. I wanted to show him that one little switch once shifted would make everything better.

But ya know what dear reader?

It wasn’t my tool, nor my job.

And I dare say that I spend an hour every day making a lot of noise and belching hot, dirty air that you dear reader have the audacity to read.

For so much of my life, I’ve choked myself. I’ve sputtered and vrrr’d.

Having both run hot and cold, I’ve flooded the engine of my life.

Sure, much of the time these foolsletters have the wrong mix of scatological humour and politically insensitive discourse.

But maybe one day, I’ll find that switch.

It’s hard to say when to engage the choke and when to turn it off.

Perhaps sometime I’ll have it just right - I’ll pull the cord and off I’ll go.

But until then?

I’m just a fool who’s happy with his tool and the terrible vrrr vrrr vrrr sound that I make each evening.

But if a life well lived were as simple as a two stroke engine a simple switch and the right mix of fuel and motivation would get us to where we need to go.

Instead?

Marvel at the sound of the sputtering engines all around you.