The Benches of destiny

Another ad for fb marketplace / kijijiji

I’m clearing out stuff that I don’t want anymore.

I’ve been selling it on facebook and writing about the experience here.

My wetsuit ended up in the hands of a keen young surfer.

Who knows where these benches will go.

For Sale:


You know what’s going on.

It’s finally happening.

You’ve found them.

The two benches that you’ve always wanted.

The two benches of your dreams.

The two benches you wrote a story about when you were six years old. The sordid tale of Bench Face and her twin brother Bench Butt.

They were part of a global consortium of anthropomorphic furniture, hell bent on removing support from their human captors. 

By any means necessary

These benches (according to the wonderful story you wrote when you were six - well done by the way!)

These benches were relentless

As you wrote,

Bench Face and Bench Butt just sat there waiting.


And still waiting.

What were they waiting for? What else could they do. Despite their training, they were still benches. What do you expect a bench to do, sing opera?

Eventually these benches fell into the hands of a notorious axe grinder, fire starter, head shrinker, surfer and all around remarkable fool - me.


Now, it’s time for you to rescue Bench Face and Bench Butt from their almost certain death.

They are made out of boards.

They don’t want to be board to death.

So save them

Fifty dollars and you get the satisfaction of knowing that these benches are finally home

Your story though completed here is ready for the next chapter.

Buy these benches. 

Go write that chapter together. 

One Derful Thing

Find a lone sock, a mitten or old scarf.

Find something that’s been knit together.

Something that you don’t want anymore.

Something you don’t need anymore.

Find a surplus thing that has been knit together.

Unwind it.

Untie the knots.

Look at how the yarn has been cramped, crinkled and changed by the knots it was pulled into.


How do you choose to unwind this yarn? Do you go slowly or quickly?

How much attention do you pay to each moment of release?

How do you feel as you unravel this?

What happens once you reach

the end?