something a humour writer must not do

There's a rule here. I'm breaking it. I'm so very sorry.

I've got a confession to make.

As a just starting out writer, this is a difficult thing to say.

There are certain people today whose brilliance requires a certain amount of deference. Their body of work speaks for itself. They really should be respected.

And?

I’m just not that interested in doing what I ‘should’ do.

Well.

I have in the past.

But not anymore.

It’s time to come clean:

I pretend to like David Sedaris.

Sure, his writing is brilliant.

I just really wish he didn't read it. His voice is among the most irritating sounds imaginable.

It was shocking really. In an attempt to develop my own style, my own voice, I figured I’d listen to how some great English language humourists read their work. After exhausting Stuart McLean, getting bored by the Americana of the Prairie Home Companion, I slid into some Sederis.

That was a mistake.

I’m expecting something brilliant.

Then I hear him.

My muscles tighten. I try to force a smile. It’s not working. I give it some more time.

Fifteen more second…