Parents are better people

I love my children.

There are times I see myself in them and I’m so proud it isn’t funny.

I love my role in listening and accepting them as they emerge into who they are.

I’m their parent, not their friend.

Your shadow needs to be your friend.

Here, I’ve shared a big chunk of my ugly side.

It’s important - especially if you've been blessed to be in the most important role there is - a parent.

Yes.

Parents are better people.

Why?

Once we meet our shadow and we can accept the most painful and ugly parts of ourselves, it becomes easier to do the same with our kids.

If not,

You might miss it when you see yourself in them.

Not the magnificent part that you love or are proud of,

But the ugly, painful, unacceptable parts of yourself.

Frequently when someone’s kids are being jerks to them, they miss the fact that their kids are behaving just as they do.

No one wants to see that ugly in themselves.

No one wants to see their own ugly in their kids.

Instead?

We punish, push and try to kick the unacceptable parts of ourselves away.

In doing so, we create shamed and pained and insecure children.

What’s more,

If you’re a parent and behave as such,

Not as a friend,

You kids might feel secure enough to let the vicious, nasty, rage filled, mopey, unfair, greedy parts of themselves out around you.

Your job?

Love them when they’re unlovable.

And hug the ugly away.

And that capacity?

That’s why parents are better people.