Happy Garfield day.

Coffee yet?

No coffee?

What’s wrong with you?

Go away, put your phone down and don’t come back until you develop a nasty caffeine addiction that you use to justify being either 1) slow in the morning or 2) a total prick in the morning or 3) a slow in the morning total prick, until you get your coffee.

Next?

Did you prepare?

Did you get to bed early last night?

Or

Did you just want to squeeze in a little more of that precious time doing important things.

Like doom scrolling marketplace or tick tock or stories or knitting or cleaning or merely enjoying a conscious conversation with someone you love.

Did you stay up late having ‘conversation’ on a Sunday?

Oh dear, your week is now screwed.

Here is a remarkably foolish guide to surviving Monday.

First, don’t set an alarm. Wake up way too late. If you live with another creature, wait for them to insist that you get up. This might be a charming love bringing you a cup of coffee, a screaming baby demanding a fresh bum or a cat eatin…