on problematic police costumes

and polite canadian murder

Warning dear reader, for many of you this comedy will be considered ‘too soon’.

Alas, ever since I heard the joke What’s NASA’s favourite soft drink - Seven up - delivered icily mere hours after the space shuttle disaster, there’s never been a joke that’s either too inappropriate nor too soon.

With that small ‘trigger promise’ in place, those of you who love staring into the darkness I’d encourage to continue reading.

And for those of you with moral pretensions, please put your phone away and go natter at someone about how awful the world is because of people like me.

Today out, on the ride with Zeke, the seals on my hubs were squeaking. They were loud, so much so that I needed neither my bell nor my polite Passing you on the left greeting.

Instead?

I sounded much like an ambulance, or a fire truck.

Or even.

Dare I say it,

A police cruiser.

People hurried to get out of our way.

It was quite wonderful sounding like, imitating the sound of a police cruiser with my bicycle. There was an inherent power that came from this deception.

Apparently it’s now problematic to imitate being a cop. Given how often I played ‘cops and robbers’ as a child I mourn for the children who will no longer get to dress up and pretend to be cops.

I guess we can put police officer costumes in the same bin of shame as those of sultan, hobo, ‘indian chief’ and others that have fallen on the cutting room floor of history.

Perhaps that’s for the best.

As you may have heard someone in ‘Merica recently dressed up as a cop and took the lives of some politicians somewhere. I’m not sure where as I’m paying as little attention as possible to such matters.

We here in Nova Scotia had a similar incident where a man dressed up as a police officer and went on a killing rampage.

There is one key difference in these actions that highlights a major difference between our countires.

In ‘Merica, this action seems to have been taken to prove a point, cause widespread change and strike fear into the hearts of Democrat politicians.

In Nova Scotia?

It was more personal, neighbourly really.

We as Canadians pride ourselves on being personally warm and very neighbourly.

So rest assured, here in Canada, we’re polite - downright neighborly really.

If any of us are going to go on a killing spree, it’s because we know you.

What’s more?

When we show up to murder you and your entire family, we’ll wipe our feet at the door and turn the lights off when we’ve finished.

Too soon you say?

Never.