On my bottom

as little as possible

I spent the day on Hoth.

There was ice everywhere.

I almost fell frequently.

But almost falling doesn’t count.

I recovered quickly and stayed dry.

I shuffled like a penguin. Each of my arms hung stiffly to the side like wings.

When I returned to the city to walk on clear pavement, I still walked in that distorted, tense penguin way.

If I worked at this place for too long, I may transform into a perma-penguin.

And it is for this reason dear reader, that I am glad my time delivering packages to odd humans is coming to an end.

Because in the end?

My arse is sore and it’s time to give it a rest.