on ivy masked insecurity
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on ivy masked insecurity
and institutional stories
Going back to school when we want to change our work can be super helpful.
No. Not for the new skills. Not for the connections. You can go create them elsewhere.
Going back to school helps us by giving us a story.
It’s a story we get to tell ourselves.
It’s a story we get to tell the others.
I’m back in school, studying law, sounds a lot better than, I’m still at that job I hate, but I’m working on a few projects. I’m looking for my next steps and am engaged in some self directed learning.
‘Going back to school’ is a kind of shorthand that everyone understands.
‘Creating a path for myself’…
That sounds weird.
School doesn’t condition us for that.
Schooling conditions us to seek out the ‘right answer’.
It is a device primarily focused on socialization and expectation realization rather than discovery and learning.
So.
A lot of the time when ‘we go back to school’ to change careers, what we’re actually saying is: This is a story that I can tell myself and others that they understand so that I don’t have to suffer the embarrassment of taking a stand and being on the hook for something that I really want to explore.
Telling the weird stories about the learning you’re doing in an unproven way feels really exposing. It’s a risky approach that leaves us vulnerable.
The power of having the edifice of an institution behind us protects us from that pain. The perceived value and legitimacy that comes with big fancy buildings and history can be important.
When we don’t believe that we’re enough, ivy covered buildings are wonderful masks for our insecurity.
on ivy masked insecurity
Sometimes we are stuck. No inkling where to go. Stuck. That was true for my son. He took a gap year because spending 8k to say I am on a path seemed stupid. At the end of the gap year, and no closer to something he wanted to explore, he decided to take a leap...almost a week into classes. There were only two potential programs open and he picked the better fit of the two. He got caught up and finished with honours. He's not obsessed with the area of study but he has some interest. Enough that he chides me for my processes related to it. What he did get were some skills that qualified him for an office job. He doesn't love it. But he loves his boss. Literally, loves his boss. He is making money, feeling financially stable, being useful, has purpose and is looking at the world differently. He has many talents, but thinks I see him through mom-eyes. I really don't. I have been teaching too long, ie assessing people. I love him, but I see a social activist, a lawyer if he wanted to make the investment, a writer, a counselor or whatever he was so obsessed by, that he would work the heck out of it. My goal is for him to be happy. To wake up and ask the day, "What awesome is in store for me and how can I make the day more awesome for others as a result of my having a great day?" I have ideas, but I am keeping them to myself. He's getting a bit bored at work and I am excited. Boredom is fertile ground for those who want to change direction. The moral of the story is school helps those who are obsessed with a topic and helpful to prime the pump for those who are stuck. In the middle? There is YouTube and Coursera. If someone was in rhe middle, I would recommend a basic business program, two years max. You will learn about business and software, meeting deadlines and working as part of a team. Those skills are 100% transferable and never a waste. Plus, it might prime your pump.