My Reading Glasses vs. The Testicle-Seeking Grizzly

and other daily annoyances

Getting old is a pain in the arse.

Much worse than that?

It’s expensive.

I spend a lot of money in order to replace things that are wearing out.

At fifty, my eyes are shot and my brain not far behind.

I’m always losing my reading glasses.

How much is it worth it to you to be able to see well enough to read.

Dear reader, if your eyes work pretty much okay, you’re likely fine most of the time. You can get by and identify vital things. You can determine things in the distance, like a speeding grizzly, running towards your crotch, ready to rip your balls off with its meaty, meaty paws.

If you can see something like that, how much is it worth it to you to be able to read? ?

For me, it's a dollar a week.

What is a dollar divided by seven?

I don't know. 12, 13 cents a day?

If you have a calculator and a moment, feel free to do the math. For our purposes dear reader, the specific sums are less than important.

Every six months, I run out of reading glasses. I buy them in packs of six.

Jeffrey brings the…