i'm sorry we're at war

how one ugly american threatens the lives of my family

We’ve had trouble with out neighbours for the past couple of years.

It’s funny. For a long time, they tended to tell us what they wanted us to do in our backyard.

They’ve had trouble with my mess.

It’s really none of their business.

After a bit of conflict, we don’t speak anymore.

I’m kinda feeling that way about America these days.

Now, if you’re a reader that I’ve connected with - (hi Devon!) I’m not angry with you and I want to continue to hear from you and your newsletter.

But for the most part, anything out of America right now, I’m really wary about.

One American imperialist intellectual, Seth Godin reminds me that we ‘pay’ with our time, care and attention.

Given that our neighbours are instigating a trade war, I want to pay as little of anything to America as possible - especially time and attention.

It’s been a long time since I’ve seen such Canadian Patriotism.

Once upon a time, I was very much a chest thumping ‘proud Canadian’. The internet as well as all of the great connections that I made with my southern neighbours slowly eroded my pride in country. It became more difficult to know what the difference was between America and the Great White North.

I still struggle to articulate this.

And, it’s simple.

Canada is not a State.

We’re Canada.

Simple eh?

But somehow Donny boy doesn’t think we matter. He’s after access to our healthcare markets and our fresh water.

That’s a slippery slope.

First, they take our markets. Then, they take our media. Next, they’ll rename Lake Louise to ‘Trump Tower Glacier.’

And when your leader suggest that our economy will be wreaked havoc upon unless we become a state?

We take that as a declaration of war.

It’s an economic war, a hostile takeover.

No shots are fired but we are pretty much at war just the same.

With that in mind, I’ve wanted to stop using as many American things as possible.

I sat down to ride my bike (made in Canada) and train. Usually I watch Tee Vee.

All the shows I like are American.

All of the platforms (networks) that I stream on, they’re American too.

Many of the people I find most entertaining?

Americans.

Fuck.

Let me be clear - I want to hurt the pocketbooks and threaten the nice Americans too.

Why?

Because I live with two people with preexisting conditions.

I live with people who are very expensive when it comes with healthcare.

In America, my families meds would cost more than our mortgage. Here, we survive. There, we’d be bankrupt—or dead. One thing’s for sure. No insurance company would touch us.

I live with two people whose life expectancies would be greatly diminished in the american system. This is not hysteria. This is truth.

Being invited to become a 51st state is as much of an existential threat as there can be around these parts.

They want to buy out our forests, our lakes, our healthcare, and call it a merger. It’s not a merger—these threatened tariffs are an invasion, just without the tanks.

So.

Despite being at war (economic war) where I want to buy Canadian as much as possible, I’m stuck, enmeshed in a lot of American companies.

Before the fucking blight that leads America backed down based on stuff Canada was already doing, I had a bit of a fit.

I started directly messaging the creators I follow.

I said stuff like: Love your stuff, but never come to canada - Americans are unwelcome here.

That was a bit mean.

And it felt good.

If you’re sitting comfortably in your American home thinking this is just politics, this Canadian dude is being nuts, you’re part of the problem. Your silence is the sound of Canada being sold off, piece by piece.

We’re not American and we’re not for sale.

I want even the nice Americans to have some sort of grasp of just how enraging the turnips’ joke was.

Sadly, I think he knows. Rage causes 95% more engagement than sex does.

And the Zuckerbergers’ blight?

Canadian Facebook?

My feed was filled with people frantically talking about how to not engage with america.

The best way?

I’ve deleted Twitler

I’ve deleted Stinkedin.

I’ve suspended my Meta accounts with the hope that I can live without it.

If you are Non-american, these ‘apps’ are merely more american technological and cultural imperialism.

Delete them.

There are options in China and Russia.

Don’t use those either.

Social media is the new tool of empire.

Get off.

And to my beloved American friends.

I’m sorry we’re at war.