I don't have time to talk

I have a bath running at home

Oh no, this isn’t me out for a bike ride.

I’m pouring a bath.

I’m riding around the block so I don’t just stare at it and mess with the temperatures.

It was case of open up the valves and let’er rip.

I had eight minutes to complete a three minute cool down ride.

And I saw my lovely neighbour who I would have liked to have stopped an chatted with.

Alsas! I was running a bath and had to get back to turn off the taps.

This is of course just how things are done around these parts. It’s not entirely safe. I mean I heard of one time that someone up around the arse end of Geoffs once emptied the aquifer for that entire section of the county while flooding out everyone downstream of him.

What a prick eh?

Given this - that EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT YOU RIDE YOUR BIKE AROUND THE BLOCK AS YOU RUN A BATH -

Why only a block?

Because if you do you could harm a lot of people.

Given my sense of urgency and duty to humanity, she was pretty darn understanding.

A second later, I farted - like I mean a real pushing powerfully propelling fart that made travel three kilometers per hour more quickly.

How have you super charged your life through flatulence?

Thanks for reading.

Weirdo.