Good money in bear shit

Lying to a cougar in the garlic capital of the world

While in California, I spent time in the town of Gilroy.

Gilroy is the garlic capital of the world.

While there I met an older, single woman - she was the mother of a friend of mine.

Her house was shocking. Everything in it was glossy. The majority of the surfaces in her house were black or white. There were chrome highlights and the occasional ‘shock’ of something very, very red.

Her hair was ‘perfect’. Her lips matched her fingernails which matched her shoes which matched the ‘shocking’ red candles on the glass topped, chrome legged coffee table in her black and white living room.

I was the only Canadian in the room.

It’s an odd thing being the only Canadian in the room.

They all think that you’re an american.

That is until you speak.

If they’re americans it will slowly dawn on them that you are not one of them.

If they’re not americans, nor Canadian, it may take a bit longer.

(yes the capitalization / lack of is on purpose. yes disrespect is intended - get over yourseslves you imperial wanke…