farting hints

and insistent mischief

My palms were clammy.

I felt the eyes of everyone burning through my clothes, through my skin and deep into my soul.

What the hell is going on here? What am I missing?

My thoughts provided neither clue nor comfort. Locked in the gaze of my fourth grade teacher, I had no idea what she wanted. I was merely attempting to be accommodating to my teacher.

No matter how I tried, she became increasingly frustrated:

Me: Yup.

Teacher: Yes

Me: Yup

Teacher: Yes

Me. Yup

Teacher: YES.

Me: Yup

This was when she exploded. Her voice shrill, face red she screamed: GET OUT AND DO NOT COME BACK UNTIL YOU LEARN SOME MANNERS.

What did I miss?

Apparently the cunt was telling me to say ‘yes’ instead of ‘yup’.

Did I pick up on it?

No.

Was I being sarcastic?

No?

Did this turd have some sort of neurotic belief about respect that she was dumping down on me?

Yup.

Was I expected to read minds or at least pick up on her hint?

Yup.

And that’s it. Hints don’t work.

Despite this she was never direct when she ‘corrected’ our apparent ‘disres…