don't just do something, stand there
what happens when people around you are doing things poorly
Today, I helped someone do it wrong.
They clearly don’t work with their hands often.
They’re not used to tools
They were clear on what they wanted to do.
They were clear on how they were going to do it.
Their plan matched their knowledge
And their skills with tools.
So, I could have helped.
I could have stepped up and offered suggestions.
I could have offered corrections.
There were better, more efficient, longer lasting, easier ways to fix this issue.
I wasn’t asked.
Nor was I necessary.
I could have done it way better.
I let him struggle.
His clothes got muddy.
His knuckles bloodied from slipping tools in unskilled hands.
I held things in place for him.
His attempts to connect them were in vain.
We did this dance for the better part of an hour.
The whole time, he was coming up with new, odd solutions.
He had plans to go to the hardware store.
… and if THAT doesn’t work, I can always…
I heard him trailing off as I left him with his project.
He’s probably still working on it right now.
One Derful Thing
What happens when you watch another person struggle?
What happens when you think you know better when they’re getting something 'wrong’ or messy, or inefficient, or contrary to the culture?
What happens to you when you let them struggle?
Find someone who is struggling.
Find someone who is struggling with something that you know you can help them with.
And this time?
Don’t just do something, stand there. Notice them struggling. Watch them struggle. Notice the feelings in your body as they struggle.
Are you a tolerant person who can tolerate the struggles and difficulties of others?
Let someone struggle. Let them learn their way.