a phenomenological account of attempted stand-up

building a up a stand one line at a time

Everyone has a reason they are alive.

We all have something that sustains our spirits.

Me?

I’m here to make people laugh.

That’s it.

I have done this for years performing in schools.

When people are surprised and delighted with outrageousness and I’ve caused that to happen? Merely remembering the experience makes me shake with anticipatory bliss. I am a border collie when it comes to the solicitation of laughter.

Some might attribute this to my weird wiring. Others may consider this as a neurotic pursuit of a love that can never be felt. Fuck those people. This is genetic. It’s in me. It’s in my bones. I would not be me without this drive to play for laughs.

I wouldn’t have to kill myself.

No.

If I did not have this instinct?

God would drop an anvil from heaven. I would be crushed by a random occurrence.

I would cease to be me.

What’s worse?

That damn road runner would likely take up politics and you wouldn’t shut it up.

Beep beep!

When I went to the open mic and attempted stand up, this is how i…