a parents laughter

momma hold my hand

Their laughter lacked malice, surprise and spite, yet it wasn’t the blissful laughter of discovery or surprise.

It’s tone wasn’t dismissive either.

It’s difficult at times to know what’s behind a laugh.

Love?

Excitement?

Wisdom.

When my daughter was born, my parents on occasion, laughed the strangest laugh.

I didn’t get it entirely. There was a sense of just you wait.

and

You really have no fucking idea what you’re getting into bud.

I knew parenting would be challenging.

Between shitty diapers, the lack of sleep and the kids being entirely dependant on me and Laura for so much of everything, I believed that when we had a newborn, we were facing the worst of it.

Teens years are / were tough.

Nothing though compares to the heartbreak and joy of parenting a young adult.

It’s such an odd thing having an adult in the house who’s also our offspring.

Watching them struggle hurts.

Letting them struggle hurts even more.

And when they slay the next dragon they’ve been wrestling with, I experience not so much…