We had seasons tickets - my son and I - for the local Major Jr. hockey team.
We loved going to the rink together. Upon arrival, I’d get a plastic cup filled with beer. He would get a plastic cup filled with candy and a bottle of pop.
By the first intermission, we’d be bursting.
There was an issue though. The toilets / restrooms at the Metro Centre were filthy.
That’s not entirely true.
It’s not entirely false either.
The experience of pissing at a stadium during an intermission is a miserable one.
Holding my penis next to wobbly, red faced men with poor spacial awareness in a hyper aggressive environment is not my idea of fun.
Perhaps the elementary and middle school game of ‘kick the nerd while they’re pissing’ had an impact. To this day I am unable to pee if I think there is someone behind me.
And at the rink?
There always is.
At first I used to fake it.
I couldn’t tell my son I had pee constipation.
I’m his dad. I need to set a good example don’t you know.
So, during intermission, I’d dutifu…
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